TABS

TABS G+ Game Review

Totally Accurate Battle Simulator is pure nonsense in the best way possible. You drop a bunch of goofy, wobbly soldiers onto a battlefield, hit start, and watch as they trip, flail, and occasionally fight like they know what they're doing. Ragdoll physics makes sure that even the best-laid battle plans turn into a circus. One second, your army looks like a well-oiled war machine, the next, they’re face-planting into the dirt while a guy with a stick somehow takes out an entire squad of knights.

The unit variety is all over the place. You can command everything from old-school warriors with swords and shields to modern fighters, zombies, and units that shouldn’t even exist in any logical timeline. Ever wanted to see cavemen take on a squad of musketeers? Or maybe you prefer watching a single tank try to survive against an army of angry farmers? It’s all possible. There are also hidden units waiting to be discovered, and they’re somehow even more ridiculous than the regular lineup.

Strategy? Sure, if you want. You can go all in with tactical placements, carefully balancing melee and ranged units, or just throw down as many random troops as possible and let the physics decide. The game doesn’t care if your army makes sense—it only cares about delivering hilarious chaos. Sometimes, the weirdest unit combinations end up winning, and other times, your entire army crumbles because one guy tripped over a rock. Either way, it’s always fun to watch.

Every battle is its own disaster. Whether you’re going through the campaign, playing around in sandbox mode, or setting up ridiculous custom battles, there’s no end to the mayhem. The AI fights like it’s never seen combat before, the physics make everything unpredictable, and somehow, even losing feels like a win because of how ridiculous things get. The best part? No two battles play out the same way, so there’s always a new way to create chaos. TABS is less about victory and more about watching complete nonsense unfold in the funniest way possible.

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